October 11, 2007

I just took a breath for the first time in months. A real breath, belly out, diapraghm extended, neck tilted back, mouth wide open, eyes staring up at the sky. Shoulders relaxed at last. Knots of worry unkinking from my spine. Real air, real feelings, real movements. Almost at tears but not the crocodile ones that have plagued me for so long. Tears of relief, almost giddiness. I’ve cracked the stasis. Things are tangible, feasible, perceptible. Exhalation is a pleasure like I’ve rarely experienced, and certainly not in a while, almost emotional, clearing parts of my soul I didn’t know were blocked. I had no clue that this cricking and cramping had been going on for so long.